I Still Believe
The first reading today is taken from the book of Job. The Book of Job is one we often don’t read because it seems to paint a picture of God as vindictive, uncaring, and unjust. We just don’t want to see God that way. It is an image that is out of sync with the God of love and promises that we hope in, the God of care and blessing that we count on.
Yet the book of Job is probably one of the most relevant books in the Bible. We shy away from it, perhaps because it hits so close to home. It challenges the most problematic faith question that we are asked by others, and we ask ourselves. If we are honest, it is a book that frightens us because we know that we, too, are fragile and can fall away from God. The Book of Job is a straight-up challenge to people of faith in every generation. It is also the most essential book of hope and solace if we allow it to be.
The Book of Job addresses the fundamental question, “How is it that God can allow suffering and bad things to happen to good and faithful people?” If God is all-powerful, why would he allow children and the defenseless to be abused, illness and disease to take the young, and poverty and disease to flourish? If God is really benevolent, why does he not punish those who are evil and bless those good?
Job is a good and faithful servant of God. He is living his life according to the law and the prophets. He is thriving and grateful for his success. He is not arrogant and does not despise the poor, but instead, he reaches out his hand with generosity to those in need. In the story, the Devil sees the goodness of Job and mocks God saying, “Of course he worships you look at how good his life is. If he was not so blessed, he would turn from you.” God says to Satan, “Go ahead, take everything away from him. Leave him without family or possessions. Then see if he still has faith.” And so, the Devil does just that. Everything is taken from Job.
This story is relevant for us because it is a story we have all lived. We have all had the experience of having some tragedy befall us or someone we love, and we wonder how God could have allowed it to happen. If we are honest, we will admit at those moments, the very core of our faith is shaken by the evil of the unjust and awful situation that surrounds us. Often, we try to put on a brave face and say the right things. We say comforting words and claim we just don’t understand the ways of God. But in our heart of hearts, our faith is shaken. We are screaming out to God, “WHY? How can this be? Are you really there at all? Why are you punishing me?”
In those moments, we need to spend some time with Job. Job screamed out at God. Job wailed at the injustices being imposed upon him, He questioned, and he doubted, and he despaired. Job’s faith took a beating and was bruised, and his heart broken. But he still stood before God and offered him his battered and beaten faith, and he said, “I believe.”
When we get pushed around by life, it is okay to scream out at God in pain, shout out with our hurt, and lack understanding. God has broad shoulders. He can take on our pain, our grief, and our doubt. He can take our damaged, broken hearts and our wavering faith and heal us. God can’t fix anything if we turn our back and refuse to place our brokenness in his hands. God wants us to come to Him not just with pious thoughts and holy words but with the truth, whatever that is. God can handle any brokenness as long as we go to him.
So, when disaster and devastation slap you around, don’t follow the Evil One’s lead and turn away from God. Instead, turn toward God and give him all the real-life anger, bitterness, brokenness, and sorrow you are carrying in your soul. God will take it all and give you the strength to whisper, “I still believe.”
In God’s Unending Love,
Gwen
